::Christians Who Hate Churches::

When it comes to Christians and my experience with the Christian world, I can sometimes get opinionated about the way we as a church should handle things; and whether in the form of a real life conversation, a tweet, a facebook status, or a blog, I am not too shy to address them.  

Seems like every time I bring up Christians, some people comment (people that don’t like churches and look for opportunities to justify staying away) brutal things that only discourage.  Some people wait, armed with bitterness, to attack the church anytime they see an opportunity.  It’s like Statler & Waldorf (Muppets), waiting with tomatoes to throw, with no intention of approving.  

This is the exact opposite of the goal for which I speak about the mistakes we (Christians/church people) make.  I share about it so that we Christians can remember or realize who and what we should be to this world, not so that angry people who consider themselves unattached, unassociated Christians can attack others and further their idea that we are fake and stay away.  Although I speak about the mistakes we make, I speak with love in my heart for the church.  

I am part of that “we”.  I am a member of the church and a Christian, and I know (better than most) the ins and outs of the church/Christian world.  I have seen some great mistakes and shortcomings of Christians and church leaders, and I’ve seen hypocrisy at it’s best, so I feel that no one can tell me that I don’t understand why they feel the way that they do about churches.  I can understand why someone who doesn’t consider themselves a Christian could hate churches based on their perspective; but for those of us who call ourselves Christians, we have not only the ability but the duty of loving and forgiving the church.

The bible, in several places, refers to the church as the bride of Christ, which illustrates how dear the church is to Jesus.  The bible never denies the problems in the church; as a matter of fact, it documents letter after letter where Paul writes the churches to correct them and instruct them.  No denial of the flaws, but over and over again the church is explained to be very precious to Christ himself.  Not flawless, but valued.  

The church has never been perfect and will never be, because no matter how much God is in it, (as long as people are still a part) it will remain blemished.  We will always fall short and we will always disappoint.  This is where it’s important to have a relationship with God that is not filtered through any spiritual leader or organization; because then your faith isn’t rocked when they (we) let you down.  And I hate to say it, but if you are spending your days angry and bitter at churches, then your spiritual life isn’t great, no matter what you feel.  God doesn’t want us to be weighed down by bitterness toward anyone, let alone something so important to Him.  To put it in perspective I think of my husband.  When you get married, two become one.  My heart is so tied in with his that there is no real separation, and if someone hates my husband, I not only have no relationship with them but I consider myself hated by them too.  You can’t be close to someone and hate such an important part of them, or the relationship becomes superficial.  You can’t love Jesus and hate the church.  

As long as there are people in the church, it will be flawed; but it’s our job as Christians to strive to be Christ-like.  We have to consider that everyone is a work in progress and accountable to God for it; and remember that we’ve all been the one who looked like a hypocrite at some point in our time as a Christian.  If you feel they’re fake in the church then go in there and show them what real looks like, but at some point you’ll find yourself being the one who is falling short.  Why?  Because it’s harder than it looks, following perfection.

But really though, bottom line:

1.  Jesus loves the church

2.  You and Him aren’t good if you don’t.

3.  Churches have bad, but they also do good.  It’s your choice which you dwell on.

Churches are made up of people who make mistakes, but there really is a great thing in there that God intended for us Christians to be connected to!  Honestly, I couldn’t tell my whole story in this post, but I can sum it up:  I grew up with a very poor example of what Christianity and church people were about, nonetheless, in church consistently.  I was bitter and very confused about it, but when I went through my teenage years and lost everything that was familiar and that I loved (and I don’t mean a boyfriend or friendship, the only family I’d known), God used the church to reach out to me and the people in it to be His hands and feet in my life.  The people that make up the church were my reminder that He hadn’t forgotten me and when there was no other reason for me to have any hope at all, I found belonging there that kept me from running to all of the wrong things to fill my voids.  

Time and time again I’ve seen things in the church that are discouraging and not right, but time after time I’ve seen the church come through and do what it’s supposed to do.  Too many people let the mistakes of a few drown out the good that is all throughout the body of Christ.  The church is family, and like your family, you love it through the tough times.  If you’re bitter and jaded, you need to ask God to deal with your heart because that’s not how He intends for you to live.  If you seriously can’t stand the church still, you need to humble yourself because your perspective of you (how great you are) is distorted.  We are ALL sinners saved by grace, and we are ALL a work in progress.  So bear with others, do your best to be a light, and leave the rest to God.  

Boom.  It’s that simple.  Not always easy, but that simple.

♫ Had a bad day ♫

In the words of the children’s book, “a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day”.  A few days ago I was having one.  Not because of any real significant bad event, but just one of those with a symphony of annoying moments that snowball into a climactic point where you want to have that all-out teenager-ish scream-fest.  The kind where you drop things, stub your toe, say the wrong thing, forget something you reminded yourself a million times not to walk out the door without, get to checkout at the grocery store in time to realize you can’t find your debit card... you know... that kind of day.  The kind where everything and everyone irritates you, and no one seems to understand.

That was my kind of day that day.  I honestly knew that nothing that was happening was really that bad in the big picture, but it was all just so frustrating that I wasn’t willing to put myself into perspective.  In those moments, it’s easy to convince ourselves that our attitude is justified, or at least avoid thinking about it.  It’s easy to chock it up to “having a bad day” and this is not who we usually are.

A very wise man (Rev. Rick Cochran) has used the analogy for years that when you squeeze a toothpaste tube toothpaste comes out (same for ketchup, etc.)- what we are comes out when we’re squeezed (metaphorical, for all you thinking of making a bowels joke).  As much as we consider our “bad days” and moments to be the exception for showing our character, they’re actually more telling than any other moment is.  Our character is not built through these times, it’s revealed.

One of the things that God is showing me is that instead of making excuses for our shortcomings through those times, we should evaluate the aspects of our personality that need changing.  When we see what went wrong with our reaction, it’s up to us whether we decide to work on it and do better next time, or try to justify our actions.  We have a tendency to compartmentalize our standards for ourselves according to certain people and situations, when really, God has set a standard for us that does not hinge on circumstance.  For some reason, it’s easy for me to remember that when I’m going through a BIG trial, but difficult with the little ones, like the day where every little thing is going wrong.  AND all the deep, soul-searching aside, life is so much better when we don’t let the little things ruin our days or change our attitude.  I’ve heard it said that life is 10% what happens to us, and 90% how we react.  Keeping a good attitude and not letting it get to you can take some re-training yourself, but it definitely leads to happier life!